Stress is a Choice

stressHere is the definition of stress:


pressure or tension exerted on a material object.
a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances.

When we talk about stress, we are rarely talking about force on an external object (unless maybe you're an engineer by trade).

So most of the time, when we talk about stress we're referring to the emotional strain resulting from adverse circumstances.

When you think about emotional strain, be aware that it could be any negative feeling:

Anger, Guilt, Shame, Fear, Anxiety, Apathy, Pain.

You may not have control of your initial feelings, however you do have control over the way you feel if you learn the tools to change your state.

I.E: Your partner cheats on your relationship. You become angry.

a) You can forgive and let go of that anger and move on with your life

b) You can hold onto the anger and it continues to affect your choices throughout your life

When is the time?

What is left out of the earlier definition of stress is most people are "stressing" about adverse possible circumstances in the future, a few hours, days or even weeks ahead.

Most people are not actually under adverse circumstances all hours of the day, but their perception is that they are because they are constantly thinking about their circumstances all day long.

This is also known as "worry". Worry drains your emotional energy.

I heard a teacher explain it this way:

A father drives to work in his A/c car, sits in his a/c office at his desk and comfy chair goes to meetings and takes some calls, then drives home in his a/c car.

He gets home to his children who want to play and he says, "Hang on a minute, I'm exhausted."

Why is he exhausted? Where did all his energy go?

It went into emotional energy, worry, fear, anxiety and stress of his workplace, not physical exertion.

How can you choose something different?

Acceptance is serenity - trust me here.

If there is some part of your life in worry or turmoil, it's because you haven't accepted it yet.

Do you know the Serenity Prayer?serenity-lake

Give us the serenity to accept what cannot be changed,
the courage to change what can be changed,
and the wisdom to know the one from the other.

There is some wonderful wisdom here. Now this isn't biblical but it is gold. If you let go of the outcome of whatever it is you're worried about, you can have peace. You accept what is, or what may happen and you make it ok. Now this concept may seem challenging, but let's go real world.


Money is most people's source of stress. It's may actually be the number 1 reason for divorce (either that or Facebook).

For example:

If you look at your finances and you're stressed about not making bills on time. What happens if they're not paid on time? Additional fee? Power turned off? Car repossessed maybe?

Well, so imagine yourself without power for a few days. Would you survive?

Might be good actually, reading a book with some candle light...


If you can make the worst possible outcome okay, then there is nothing left to stress about.

Let me give you the flip side of that.

Does stressing about not paying your bill help you in any way?

Does the fear help?

It does not. But do you know what does? Courage.

Having the courage to do what you can, work as much as you can, earn as much as you can and be thankful.

Now when you're paying the bill, the stress over it didn't help you at all, but the courage to do what you could, the acceptance of whatever happens that is outside your control is okay.

And you realize you absolutely have CHOICE over what you "stress" over.

If you're struggling with workplace stress, anxiety, fear, trust issues, or any other health issues, please reach out and let me assist you.

Click here to contact me.

Yours in health, wellness and gratitude,

Chris VanBerg
Think Great Lose Weight
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IG: @vanberg101
Twitter: @vanberg101


"If you don't make time for your wellness, you WILL make time for your illness" -TGLW

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